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[+] gifts for the best man, groomsmen (and the bride)

- the groom's wedding gift for his bride

- guide to buying lingerie

- thank you gifts for the groomsmen

wedding night performance

how to impress your future mother-in-law

married life after the honeymoon

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A Gift from the Groom to his Bride [Page 1 of 1]

"Just get your ass to the church on time!" she tells you. By now, an educated groom knows that there's much more to weddings than that. Sure, you've got your tuxedo and you might have even made an appointment for your first professional shave to look your absolute best on the big day. But perhaps the most important thing of all is a gift for your true partner in crime (and in life)--your bride.

Huh???

"Hold on just a second," you might be thinking. The groom is on the hook for yet another wedding-related purchase? This might even be the first you're hearing about a gift from you to your bride-to-be, and hopefully it's not too late. Many men from a wide range of backgrounds and experiences are oblivious to this custom. Even after all the clams you've shelled out for that tux, gifts for the groomsmen, the dance lessons (that's right - dance lessons), the honeymoon and the forty-seven other things on the checklist, your bride and possibly even her more traditional mother might also be expecting you to present her with something else to help commemorate that special day. (ed. -- This wedding thing can be a total circus, we know.)

If you're lucky, your bride will think this tradition is ridiculous and would prefer you spent the money on a personal trainer for yourself (no hint there, groom.) That said, regardless of the tradition, here's what to consider.

The Tradition

First, your bride might not even know that you are "supposed" to give her a gift. Then again, if you choose to forego a gift for her, you might be getting your marriage off on the wrong foot, especially if you're about to gain a hard to please, or very traditional mother-in-law. In an interview with GroomGroove.com, recent bride, Helen M.,of New York City, was told by her mother that, traditionally, the bride should be given a pearl necklace. (Hint, Hint). Helen's groom, Stephen, said "I basically refused to succumb to the tradition because it should be my choice."

On one hand, Stephen is correct; gift-giving should be optional and a personal choice. But, on the other hand, when Stephen did present Helen with a strand of beautiful pearls with a jeweled clasp on the morning of their wedding, she "cried so much that she had to re-do her makeup," he reports.

Sure, many grooms make their brides and mothers-in-law cry on the blessed day, but the kind of tears Helen shed are the kind of result you're after. This is especially true if she, like Madonna before her, is a material girl.

Grooms! Know your bride...

It seems like such a simple point: you're getting married. You know your bride, right? But if she's not a traditionally-minded bride, she might react the way recent bride, Julia D., of Ann Arbor, Michigan did. Julia readily admitted that although it might have flown in the face of tradition and it might not even seem romantic to some, her bride's gift was "way better than a silly pair of earrings". Julia and her groom were headed to Italy for their honeymoon, and her future husband gave her a leather jacket as a wedding gift. A practical gift for some, but Julia says "whenever I wear the jacket, I think about our time in Florence." In her mind, it was a perfect gift and an even better memento of their wedding and honeymoon than earrings or a necklace at the bottom of her jewelry box.

This just might be a chance to really shine, like this husband-to-be did. One groom "tracked down a valuable and nostalgic book - the same exact copy - that I sold in my leaner years to make rent" said bride Jen K., who was married in July 2007. That groom really took the time to listen to his bride-to-be. That kind of gift is the sort that can keep right on giving all the way past the wedding day and towards a very happy marriage.

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Wed, May.27th 2009
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This is not helpful, I thought you were actually selling gifts not just ideas!!!
Sonya
Thu, May.21st 2009
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i'm going to be getting marries in 2 years. yes i know that sounds like a long time, but it takes alot of planning considering he wants to plan most of it. i told him i wanted a beach wedding 2 yrs. ago and he was planning our wedding before we started dating! i feel lucky to have him in my life. and pearls are the last thing i want from him. his love and being with him is all i need¢¾
Adam
Wed, May.13th 2009
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I got my wife a pair of custom Nike sneakers in pink/camo with Mrs. **** on the heels from the NikeID website. Her mom and her aunts all thought they were awesome. She LOVES them, too. She didn't want/need a gift and we are both non-traditional people, but I wanted her to have these and she wears them on rare occasions so that she doesn't wear them out. That said, I believe couples should give gifts from the heart and with their beloved's needs, wants, and desires in mind. My wife loved these shoes because I picked them out for her with her in mind and because they had her new name and title on them.
Groom to be
Wed, May.6th 2009
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Oh she will be getting a pearl necklace on the wedding night, but I am also getting her a gift.
Amanda
Thu, Apr.2nd 2009
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I'm 20, my FH is 22. I'm not sure what he's getting me, or if he's getting me anything...but I don't mind regardless. Its sappy, but I'm happy I'm getting HIM. I decided, because he loves music, that I will remodel the basement of our new house (we finalize in two weeks, a month before the wedding) into a studio for him. Its not cuff links, or a coat, but I'm a designer...so it means more to him because he'll have his own "spot" that I was able to give to him. Jon will never read this article again...but I think for everyone else, you can benefit from his ignorance.
sue
Sat, Mar.28th 2009
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Pearls mean TEARS, So I DON'T WANT ANY...JUST GET ME A LOVELY DIAMANTE NECKLACE PLEASE XX
Ashley
Mon, Mar.16th 2009
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My fiance keeps asking me what i want for our wedding, he has made it very clear that he wants a new Bow to go hunting with... yes I will soon be a deer hunters widow but I have no clu what to tell him. he gets me jewlary all the time so that would be just another gift I want something cute and romantic but i don't know waht to tell him!
ummm....
Mon, Mar.9th 2009
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calm down people... there's a reason its called tradition. people feel a connection in doing it so they DECIDE to do it. whether or not you personally want to do it is YOUR decision (as said above). And there are other traditions... like not having cakes, being enviromentally friendly, or changing out of your dress at the reception. not to mention inserting a "fun dance" into a yawn-worthy slow dance. : ) Wedding are meant to celebrate the individuality of the couple themselves. in doing this, you will know how it should go.
deez
Thu, Mar.5th 2009
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I give my fiance pearl necklaces all the time (ha!)
Wed, Feb.25th 2009
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This video says it all http://www.comedycentral.com/videos/index.jhtml?videoId=217479&title=timing-de-veers-diamonds
MrsWooldridge
Mon, Feb.16th 2009
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Jon, I feel sorry for you. First of all, being of the younger generation (I'm 26), I'm a COMPLETE traditionalist. I'm not going to be upset if my fiancee doesn't get me something for our wedding. He's basically paying for the majority of the wedding himself. However, he's a traditionalist as well, and really enjoyed this article. I think this particular read has EVERYTHING to do with the younger generation. It teaches us the value of tradition. We start our own traditions based off of those that have been cherished and handed down through the centuries. I'm even excited about my family's Scottish plaid being incorporated into our wedding...its a 500-year-old tradition. So, as for taking it a step further? Why don't YOU get creative? It takes creativity and individuality to take an old tradition, put a younger twist on it, and still have it recognizable as traditional. So speak for yourself when you're talking about turning the younger generations away. I happen to favor the romantic fairy-tale, thank you very much! That's a perfect opportunity for creativity.
Fri, Feb.13th 2009
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I wonder how many brides get pearl necklaces on their wedding night?
Sat, Jan.24th 2009
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My husband got me a pearl necklace as a wedding gift which I wore on my wedding day and I've cherished and worn over and over again for the 9 years we've been married. Any type of strand of pearls or even a set (necklace, bracelet and earrings) will never go out of style and is sure to be the most special gift she'll receive. It can be her "something new" for her to wear with her wedding dress or her rehearsal attire. Down the road she can pass it along to your daughter as her "something old" for her own wedding. There are reasonably priced sets out there too. Go to http://www.silverlandjewelry.com/Bridal-Jewelry-Sets.html
groom-to-be
Mon, Jan.19th 2009
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nice! i thought it would be nice to get her a little something, and this confirms it!
K
Fri, Jan.16th 2009
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SO if this article sucks and doesn't give the viewpoint of the younger generation how about you stop complaining and give your opinion of that younger generations viewpoint. Stop complaining about the article and put something forth more so then "this sucks". Either provide some information for a solution or STFU.
Mac
Tue, Jan.13th 2009
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Jon, Exactly what traditions have the younger generation given us. Oh I know starting a food fight with the wedding cake, and setting the Brides dress on fire. Yeah really cool.
29th Infantry
Wed, Nov.19th 2008
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This is the first I have ever heard of this tradition, but I sure am happy I read about it. I always find myself feeling like my bride to be has two full plates while I pause the Xbox for a min when she asks me a question. Of course that isn't how it really is, but I feel that a gift given to the bride to be on the morning of the wedding is just what she earned after planning the wedding for the last year. I will be sure to let you know how the gift goes!
william
Tue, Oct.7th 2008
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i found the article very helpful. it is nice to see the traditional point of view. It helps quite a bit. As for people saying the younger crowd is creative, we can't be too creative since we have to read articles to get ideas and information
Debbie
Wed, Sep.24th 2008
Rating:
Jon, maybe YOU should write the article for the new generation. And what would it say, I wonder? Dump the tradition of gift-giving entirely? Give your bride-to-be something you picked up at the last second? Make sure it's something she's really going to hate? Seriously, you need a lesson in manners. For one, the article was very clear that TRADITIONALLY, jewelry is the gift of choice for many couples. However, it was also EXPLICITLY clear that there are plenty of couples choosing to go a different route. The leather jacket and the book, for example. So you have traditional gifts and non-traditional gift examples. What else could you be looking for? My FH and I are all about "starting new traditions," as you call it. However, there's only two ways to start: one is to take a completely blank slate and design something brand-new. If this is your preference, then what the heck are you doing on this website? Go get a piece of paper and do your own thing. You don't need an article to tell you what to do. The second option, which I believe this article is assisting with, is to provide couples with enough options to get them started. From there, you can decide what fits, what doesn't, and what can be modified. But you have to start from somewhere. FYI, my FH and I are very much a part of that "younger" generation, but we certainly don't insult a writer simply because their article was not helpful enough for us. We either deal, or we move on. Don't give our generation a bad name just because you can't be satisfied.
Jon
Wed, Sep.3rd 2008
Rating:
Your article is really lacking in the web 2.0 aspect and you have completely turned away your younger generations. Your article only gives info on a traditional wedding and then touts gifts that fly against tradition. Take it a step farther as today's younger generation is much more creative and much less focused on old tradition as they are focused on starting new traditions.

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