In an episode of Sex and the City, Carrie Bradshaw (aka that hottie all men love - Sarah Jessica Parker) highlighted a common catastrophe for well-intentioned grooms everywhere. Her boyfriend buys her an engagement ring with the intention of proposing, after enlisting help to find the "perfect" ring. However, Carrie uncovers the ring accidentally while looking through Aidan's clothes. Her reaction? Joy and excitement? Nope. She vomits. It's the ugliest ring known to man. Is it better then to surprise your fiancee, or is this a lesson that it's safer to go engagement ring shopping with her?

The argument for surprise

It's a long-standing tradition to hit jewelry stores with a wad of hard-earned cash, in search of the perfect engagement ring to represent the promise of lifelong love and commitment. For one, surprise -- especially on this scale -- is highly romantic. It's a production that you own from conception to the big reveal. Boys, it's one of man's few dragon sleighing moments left in 21st century life.

If you hit a home run and find the ring of her dreams all on your own, you prove to your now bride-to-be (and the world) that you really "get her". If you are taking this leap to ask her to be your wife, surely you know her tastes and style, so what are you afraid of? If you don't at least try, your fiancee may even be a bit disappointed in you.

And isn't this more than just a gift for her? Isn't this ring a symbol of your love for her, in which case she should love and cherish it, no matter what?

How to do it this way: From the moment you decide that she's the one, start taking notes -- physical notes. Write down any rings she admires in a store window or on a friend's finger. Listen closely for hints such as "I think it's so tacky when women have giant rocks on their fingers." Notice if her jewelry collection consists entirely of silver and no gold; chances are she'll want a platinum or white gold band. Does she like diamonds or colored stones? Is she into modern things or antiques? These details will help you get as close as you possibly can to finding her the perfect ring.

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